what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
