smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Randomize
