Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
