I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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