dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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