Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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