how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
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