Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
