I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize