I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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