Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I have feelings that need drinking.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
