get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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