Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
