I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
