i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
