STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize