How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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