I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
