I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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