That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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