Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
