He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
