Me. At least after what I've been through.
I bet he comes in French.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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