is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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