I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
