i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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