I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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