I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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