Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Randomize
