Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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