you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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