Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
