More tranny stories later!
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
