so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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