Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
