Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
