just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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