He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
