Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize