We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
