I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Randomize
