everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize