Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize