My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
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