Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
