need another drink. this is the easiest way
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
