Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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