Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
