It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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