May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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