I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize