omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
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